GROSS

I'm sorry if I offend, but this one thought has been on my mind for the last two weeks, so I felt the need to get it out - I think smoking is the absolutely grossest habit/addiction ever!!! Yes, I feel so strongly about it that I gave it three exclamation points. It's gross. It's nasty. It makes me want to vomit. I actually started dry-heaving the other day when a man sat in front of me on the bus, reeking of nicotine and rat poison. I think I breathed half as much as I generally do in a twenty minute period, and I spent the next 30 minutes at work smelling my hair, my coat, my clothes, hoping the smell didn't stick to me, and wondering how'd I get the burning stink out of my nose. I think I might've actually died on the bus, but luckily I'm not asthmatic, and somehow my will to survive allowed me to hold my breath longer than usual and survive on shallow breathing at other times.
I don't think I'm brave enough to blast any smokers to their face, but I am not beneath evident eye-rolling and heavy sighs, with slight coughs and obvious nose wrinkling. I just hate smoking so much, and I hate being around it. So, those of you who smoke, please find a way to not come near me. Don't sit near me on the bus (better yet, take a different bus completely - you will kill me one day if you don't kill yourself), don't walk by me on the street. And don't hold a long conversation about how unfair it is that you can't smoke in restaurants and public buildings, because all of your arguments are crap! Yes, I'm talking to you, guy from the bus a couple weeks ago who tried to argue it was unfair to not allow smoking inside, because what if someone came in a sprayed hairspray all around and that was just fine. First of all, that's the worst analogy ever, because I wouldn't like someone spraying their hair in a restaurant either, so I'd outlaw that as well as smoking. And second, your arguments were all fallacious and I had multiple counterpoints for everything you said. Make a better point and then get back on my bus.
That's really all I have to say. In conclusion, this is my first official rant on my blog. I don't have many rants very often, but this felt like a good one to start with. Don't worry, I'm not actually crazy or mad at the world - it just seems like that once every six months when I feel like I am.