The Jingling and the Tinkling of the Bells*

I got a new necklace a few weeks ago that I really like - it's a chunkier necklace with maybe 20 strands of pink and red beads twisted together. I wear it all the time, despite the fact that the loop in the back unraveled a little too quickly, which leads me to believe it was relatively cheaply made (what up, American Eagle? I can't believe such a high-end store would sell something that would fall apart so quickly!!! To think I spent a whole $10 on this necklace, just for it to break a few wears in...), but I figured out how to tie an easy-to-undo knot in the back so I can still wear it, so we're cool.

But while I love the necklace, I'm still not sure about one of the features on it. The necklace was made with a loop in the back to keep the other end connected - usually the other side has some sort of thick ball of twine or whatever to keep it in place. This necklace has a little bell on it to put through the (now imaginary) loop, which tinkles every time I get up or walk around. Basically, it's like a little tracker so people always know where I am if they need me - a feature that would've been great when I was little and getting lost all the time, but not so awesome when I work in a relatively quiet office and like to walk around sometimes...

It also reminds me of the scripture from Isaiah, which I think of the first time I hear it ring when I wear it:

"Because the daughters of Zion are haughty, and walk with stretched forth necks and wanton eyes, walking and mincing as they go, and making a tinkling with their feet...In that day the Lord will take away the bravery of their tinkling ornaments about their feet..." (Isaiah 3:16, 18)

Which makes me more than a little bit nervous about my future. Oh the women with their tinkling ornaments. I know it's not on my feet, but all the same, I'm ornamented with jewelry that makes noise when I move!! I am among the women who will be totally messed up "in that day"!!!! I'm not quite prepared for that...

Plus, I just feel a bit like a cow, walking around with a bell around my neck, ringing everywhere I go. And I must say, rarely do I enjoy feeling like a cow.

I suppose that means I should try to find a solution to this potentially life-destroying situation I find myself in. But if I cut off the bell - the easiest answer - I won't have any anchor to tie the other side to. And I'm too lazy to somehow connect a different anchor to the necklace (plus, it's just not that simple of a fix, the way the necklace is made).

So I think I'll do what I usually do - leave it as it is. And continue to enjoy laughing at myself for the silly connections to personal doom and destruction that I like make (I'm a spiritual hypochondriac). And rob myself of opportunities to sneak up on people and scare them. Luckily, that's not something I participate in daily, anyway, so I think things will work out just fine.

I'll just have to keep reminding myself that the ringing in my ears is not a medical issue. Though I may consider convincing others that the ringing they're hearing is all in their head and worthy of serious medical attention. Because how great a prank would that be?

(*This bell ordeal may or may not also make me want to quote various parts of my favorite Edgar Allan Poe poem / rap again...)